My Beautiful Boy
by Snow.and.Roses.24
Summary: Bella Swan's best friend, geeky Edward Cullen comes to her one night, broken and so close to giving up that he's gone to desperate and heartbreaking measures to try to find a way out. Can she fix him? A/H Geekward. Give it a shot?
1. Chapter 1

Edward Cullen is the kid that wears highwaters and Buddy Holly glasses. He's the kid that carries a trapper keeper and always has an ample amount of pens. He doesn't speak a whole lot, and when he does its usually some random fact that has nothing to do with the situation or conversation at hand. He blushes at the drop of a hat and his skinny, gangly form makes for bouts of clumsiness that usually result in the books that he's carrying ending up sprawled out across the floor, along with his body.

Edward Cullen's hair is downright crazy. It sticks out in all directions and is the strangest shade of reddish-brown I've ever seen, that is, when he doesn't gel it down and comb it into an Andy Griffith style, complete with a part down the left side. He is socially awkward and has a tendency to stutter when speaking to people he doesn't know well. He is the kid that's lived next door to me my whole life and the kid that I share all my secrets with. He's the kid that I'd trust with my life, if the situation called for it. I am Edward Cullen's only friend and really, he's mine as well.

Edward Cullen plays the piano and writes his own music. He spends hours at a time eating popcorn and watching Star Wars with his action figures lined up beside the television in his Harry Potter boxers. He reads for fun and probably knows more words than are in the dictionary. He can speak French, Spanish, and Italian and a little bit of Japanese, but most of all…

I love him. I love him so much I can barely stand it. And along with that, I want him.

I want him on his piano. I want him on his Spiderman bedspread. I want him on his computer table and on his kitchen table. The list goes on…and at this point I think you get it.

So here I am, lying on my bed, staring at the blank, white ceiling, thinking of him and wishing the ache and dampness in my middle parts would just go away when lo and behold, I hear a knock on my window and guess who it is?

I'll give you one hint.

Speak of the adorably nerdy neighbor boy and he shall appear.

He usually comes here when he's had a particularly bad day and needs a friend. I can't tell you how tiring it gets dealing with the bullies of Forks High School who want nothing more than to give you swirlies and chuck your books away just because they have nothing better to do and no self esteem. Not that it's ever happened to me. I'm your average wallflower, but I've seen the works on him and it hurts. I can feel it when he hurts.

Edward's a strong kid but sometimes it gets to be too much. I can't tell you how many times he's come into my room at night and cried himself to sleep in my arms. It's embarrassing for him, I'm sure, so we never really talk about it, but I'm glad he trusts me enough to let me see this side of him.

I open the window and he swings himself in, all six feet two inches of his seventeen year old body landing with a muted thud on my carpet. His eyes are glassy with unshed tears, and the red rims make his green orbs stand out against the alabaster skin of his cheeks.

All too soon, my girly ache is moved as it centers in my heart instead because my beautiful boy is upset again. This time feels different and it worries me.

"I did something bad, Bella." He says and I open my arms for him as he crawls onto my bed. My boy sobs into my shoulder and I stroke his wild hair, waiting for him to tell me.

"What is it, honey? What did you do?" He pulls back slightly with a red face and I actually notice his glasses are gone. I raise my hand to touch the space between his nose where they would normally rest and trail my finger down the bridge of his nose. He closes his eyes and my hand moves to his cheek to wipe the tears. He leans into my hand and his eyes close, but I still want to know.

"Where are your glasses Edward?" I ask, because he obviously isn't going to answer my previous question.

"They broke them. I had to put in my contacts so I could see to get here. They cornered me on my way from school and they…they hurt me…physically… and that's normal, but it wasn't just that. They said awful things, Bella. They said awful things and what hurts so much is that what they said was true so I did something bad. I did something really, really bad."

I notice that his nose and eyes are swollen and red from crying, but he has the hint of a slight bruise on his cheek. There is a cut on his lip. I want to kiss it better. Even so, he's paler than normal and it scares me.

"What did you do that was bad?" I ask again, because I really need to know. I can't help if I don't know. He pulls back from my arms completely and drops his gaze to my purple down comforter. I'm confused as my Edward fidgets with his left sleeve and becomes restless before taking a deep breath.

Slowly, cautiously, he pulls up the sleeve to reveal a bandage covering the inside of his wrist and I panic. Oh, Edward. What have you done?

I see what's coming, but at first I don't believe it. I can't beliveve it. There's no way he would have because I can't even fathom...

No, he didn't.

He couldn't have.

He wouldn't.

My hand is clasped over my mouth to keep the sob in and my chest is heaving in protest, yet I still refuse to believe. Slowly, the bandage comes back and there it is, the slice running across his wrist at the place where his hand meets his arm.

He did.

"Oh, Edward." I say and I take his arm in my hands and my heart breaks. He's still looking at the floor.

My tears come freely now, at the thought of losing my beautiful boy. I find myself angry that he's in so much pain that he considers this an option. I'm sad that he thought this was his only way, and I'm relieved that he stopped and that he came to me.

I'm also sorry that he's disappointed in himself and that he thinks I'm disappointed in him as well, because I'm not. I'm just so sad and so terrified because honestly, what would I do without him? I wouldn't live without him.

"I'm sorry." He sobs over and over and I take him in my arms once again. I feel the need to wrap him in my body and soul and protect him from those evil people. He's too good for that.

"No baby, don't be sorry. It isn't your fault." I hush him because he has no reason to be sorry. It's all those monsters' fault.

"It's okay. You're okay." I tell him because he's here with me now and I won't let anything hurt him while he's with me.

I'm so overwhelmed with the enormity of the situation and with the love I feel for him and the desperation to have him know just how much I need, him so I grab his face in my hands and make his eyes see mine.

"I need you, Edward. Never again, okay? I need you with me. The end of you is the end of me, you understand? Never again. Okay?" I tell him seriously and sternly, yet I know I'm about to break too as my voice cracks with my confessions. My face is hot as the tears trail between us and I'm so lost to it all that my head is spinning in worry.

He nods and he says, "I understand," but I don't think he does. It occurs to me for the first time that maybe he doesn't know how much I love him and I feel stupid for not telling him sooner. Then I realize that maybe it's not that he never said anything about it because he doesn't feel the same, but maybe he just doesn't know. No, scratch that. I know he doesn't know. I can look at him right now and see that he doesn't know.

"No, Edward. You don't understand." I tell him as I draw him nearer. Now isn't the time to fear rejection. Now is the time to lay it all on the line.

"I can't live without you, okay Edward? I need you in my life like water and air and I love you so much it hurts. I need you, okay? Don't you get that I need you? You have to promise me this will never happen again. Promise me."

I'm shaking with desperation and grief and with my need for him to understand and I'm sobbing now too.

He looks stunned but he gives me a soft but fierce "I promise," and that's all I need before I crush his mouth to mine for the first time, unable to stand the distance any longer, still unable to believe that I could have lost him forever.

His lips are so soft and he tastes like tears, rain, vanilla, and Edward. My hands clutch his hair and I'm relieved that he kisses me back with enthusiasm as he hold me so tight with his good arm and as much as he can with his hurt one.

We kiss for a long time with lips and tongue and heartstrings askew. When I pull back I'm dizzy and I'm so torn between happy and sad that I don't even know what I am anymore.

He's shivering because he's cold and scared and his beautiful emerald eyes are staring back at me in wonder. I'm sure I'm looking at him the same way.

Oh my beautiful boy. He buries his face in my neck again and holds me so tight I feel almost like I'm a part of him.

"I love you, Bella." He whispers and I cry some more because I can't help it. My fingers are lightly digging into his hair and I'm pushed as close as I can get but it's not close enough. He's still shivering.

Reluctantly, I loosen my grip and take his hand, leading him to the bathroom, relieved about the fact that my father is in Indiana visiting my Grandma Marie for a couple of weeks.

He trails along awkwardly, no doubt confused but he's a smart boy. He starts to catch on as I begin to fill the tub with hot water.

Turning to him, I place my hands at the base of his t-shirt and lift it above his head and he reaches his arms up. As the shirt comes off I see beautiful ivory skin covered in black and blue. My heart breaks again as my hands run over them. My poor beautiful boy. He shudders at my touch and I make my way to his belt and khakis, lowering them to the floor so he's left in just his boxers.

My eyes meet his again and lock there as I carefully lay my hands on his hips were his boxers begin. Slowly, very slowly, I begin to push them down and his hands cover mine. His eyes clench shut and he's holding his breath. He's nervous. Again, slowly, his hands move with mine to lower them to the floor and he's left before me, completely bare.

I see him, all of him, and he's perfect in every way and from what I can see…he wants me. His eyes open, nervously, and I make sure to tell him in my gaze just how perfect I think he is.

Then, it's time for me to be nervous, because I clutch the hem of my own night shirt in my hands and begin to pull it over my head, making sure it's okay with him. His hands reach mine and pull them away and I'm scared he doesn't really want me and that's why he doesn't want me undressed, but he puts his hands underneath my shirt and places them on my bare hips. So slowly that it burns a trail across my skin, he moves his hands up my sides, never breaking contact and taking my shirt with him as he goes. It feel so good that I forget I was even insecure at all before.

Hooking the sides of my panties, he pulls them down in the same manner and there we are, both totally exposed for each other.

I turn the water off and he steps in first, clutching my hand as he lowers himself into the water. I come in second, settling on top of him so that we are chest to chest and I bury my face in his neck. I unhurriedly lower myself onto him completely, taking him inside me and he gasps at the feeling. It hurts more than you can imagine as my barrier breaks to him, leaving me completely his.

We're both gasping for air at this point as I'm trying to let the pain fade and he's trying desperately not to come. I know this is the first time for both of us and I'm glad that I'm already on birth control for my cramps so that I can feel all of him.

After an immeasurable amount of time the hurt lessens and I move against him, but not that much, because I'm never willing to let my clutch on him go. One of his arms is around my waist and the other is trailing up my back because his hand is settled in my hair, and that's also where his face is buried.

After rocking a few times it feels more incredible than painful. I know I won't come the first time but I'm so close to him and that's all that matters. All I need is just to feel him and the fact that he's inside me is more than enough.

After a bit I feel his stomach muscles contract against mine and I know he's close. Soon enough he lets himself go inside of me and he shudders into me again, but this time it isn't the cold.

I pull back slightly to see his face but I keep him in me. He's looking at me with the most indescribable expression…but I'll try my best.

He has new, unshed tears in his eyes, but with the way he's smiling at me, I don't think they're bad tears. His eyes are glowing with a light that I've never seen from him. He looks happy for the first time in a long time and I'm happy too.

I'm smiling bigger than I ever have and my face is wet with the tears coming down. He wipes them away with the pads of his thumbs and kisses me again, sweetly and softly, but for a very long time. My Edward's hands travel my body and mine travel his, but as the water gets cold we stop and I pull off of him.

We drain the tub and take a shower because we didn't really get around to cleaning him off, which was what it was intended for in the first place. After our round in the tub, however, it's both of us who need a good cleaning.

He washes my hair and body with such care and gentleness that I almost start crying again and I do the same for him.

When we get into bed he surprises me by kissing down my body to my center, where he makes my world explode with his mouth. I kiss him goodnight, tongue and all and I taste myself on him but I don't really mind and he likes it a lot.

Finally, I curl into him with my back to his chest as he spoons me. I kiss his cut wrist and lay our intertwined fingers on my stomach as we snuggle under the covers.

I tell him that I love him and he tells me right back and I know it's all going to be okay because I have my beautiful boy with me now and I'll never let him hurt again.

**A/N: Review?**


	2. Chapter 2

Rain splatters on the roof as I begin to awaken. The room is grey from lack of sunshine, but it isn't uninviting. It's more cozy, like I'm in my own little bubble. Today is the kind of day that you're supposed to stay inside, curled up with a book or watching television in your pajamas. I'm incredibly warm and wrapped in a cocoon of comfort as I recall the saddest, yet most fulfilling dream I've ever had when I feel a shift next to me.

Disbelief is the most prevalent line of thought running through my head. It can't be possible that this has actually happened.

Reality sets in as I look over and see my beautiful boy sleeping peacefully with his arms securely around me. With one last smile I unplug my alarm clock, roll over, and snuggle deeper into his arms, reveling in the complete contact- void of even the slightest bit of nightwear.

I awake once more some time later to a pleasurable tickling sensation on my neck. I smile again as I realize that my beautiful boy is trailing kisses up my body. He reaches my lips and kisses them lightly as I tangle my hands into his hair.

There is no hello or good morning, only the sound of my name on our skin as he breathes it into me. "Bella" he sighs and I purr in contentment. The mood of the morning is so much of a contrast to that of last night. There is no pain, no longing, only happiness and love. I can stay like this forever with my beautiful boy.

I can feel him, ready against my thigh and I wait for him to take me, but it never comes. Taking matters into my own hands, I position myself for him and he looks at me, hazy eyed.

"You're sore." He says. It isn't a question. I shake my head. Not sore enough to keep away from my Edward.

"Please." I whisper, and he hesitates, but slowly slides into me.

It's a little raw, but it doesn't hurt like the first time and I sigh happily. We're exactly like we should be. After seventeen years of friendship, we're finally where we belong.

We rock slowly over and over and the bed creaks softly as he kisses me, morning breath long forgotten. His lips dance with mine until I run my tongue along his bottom lip and his meets mine in gentle passion, tasting, massaging feeling each other in every way possible.

He breaks away and his head drops to my shoulder. I know he's close and I am too. With one last hard thrust we come together, exploding in blind light.

We come down off our highs and Edward looks me in the eye.

"No school today?" He asks.

I simply giggle and shake my head no. Neither one of us has ever skipped a day of school in our lives. Somehow, this seems more important than anything ever has before. I think we deserve a day off.

* * *

The next day that we return is interesting. Edward and I part ways and I ache missing him, but it's just for one class period. After it's over I head to my locker and there's someone there I never want to see again.

Every word out of his mouth is ignorant and foul. I can barely understand how awful one person can be. I blame his father, James. They're both horrible men. "What part of 'No' don't you understand? I retort angrily.

I nearly vomit as Mike runs his clammy hand up my arm as I shove my books into my locker.

"Come on sweet thing, don't be like that. Just come to the movies with me and we'll get dinner. I'll even let you kiss me at the end of the night, if you're good. My hands are feeling awfully sore from nerd patrol, maybe you could be my naughty nurse?"

I snap, not being able to take it anymore. With one last shove of my books, I slam my locker door shut and attack.

I roughly grab Mike's arm and twist him so that it's pinned behind his back and his face and chest are pressed harshly against the lockers. With my free hand, I grab him by his hair and pull his head roughly toward me so that I can hiss into his ear.

"From this point forward, you so much as look at my boyfriend wrong and I swear to god I'll come the fuck after you. You tell anyone and I will not hesitate to press charges. Harassment, sexual harassment, gang activity, that stash of E you keep in your wallet and flaunt at all the parties, you name it I'll spill it. I've got loads on you."

He hisses in pain and I take satisfaction in the fact that his words come out strangled and pained.

"Look, Bella, I don't know why you're doing this or what your boyfriend, whoever he is, has to do with me, but I'm sorry."

Mike's eyes are wide with false innocence but I see right through him. I want to smack that look right off his face. I tighten my hold on his arm and he cries out in pain again. I'm starting to learn that he responds better when you speak his language.

"Oh, what, Mike? You gonna pull the pussy Mama's boy act? I think you forget who my daddy is. And who do you think he's going to believe? I'm telling you right now, you watch yourself or you'll have much worse than a sprained arm. Got it?"

"Got it, got it." He chokes out and I feel two arms wrap around my waist. My body relaxes slightly as I hear a honey-smooth voice speak quietly into my ear.

"Let him go, Bella. He's not worth it." The arms pull me backwards and I let them, only because of who they belong to. I look up, guiltily into those striking green eyes as my beautiful boy stares back at me with a gentile smile. My hands find their way to his flushed cheeks and he leans into them.

"But you are worth it," I whisper. I barely register Mike trying to recover.

"Cullen? He's your boyfriend? Why of all people would you pick _him_?"

"Because he's everything you're not and more," I spit at him. Then, with cold eyes and blind fury, I pull away from Edward and knee Mike in the groin. I can't help but smile vengefully as he groans in agony on the floor, but I feel guilty again as warm arms envelop me once more.

"God, why don't you control your psycho-bitch girlfriend, Cullen?" Mike wheezes from the floor and I wonder how a boy who gets away with as much as he does can be so stupid.

Edward lets me go, his expression hardening as he lifts Mike up by the front of his jacket and punches him right in the face. Hard. He leans in really close and hisses in Mike's face.

"You can beat me, steal from me, and shred me of every ounce of self esteem that I have but when you talk about my girlfriend like that, you can expect to get back what you dish out times Vis of "I' times 'T' plus one half times 'A' times 'T' squared. Understand?

"Uh…what?" Mike stutters.

Idiot.

Edward rolls those beautiful eyes and looks at Mike as though he's mentally retarded. Of course Mike doesn't understand. He can barely spell his own name.

"It's initial velocity multiplied by time in addition to one half also multiplied by---you know what? Never mind. My point is, talk bad about my girlfriend and I'll beat you up. A lot. Get it?"

Holy Jesus Christ on a Cracker. Edward is setting my girly parts on fire over here and I just want to haul him off to a supply closet and have my dirty way with him.

I force myself to focus because there's a scum bag here to be dealt with. I'll just have to fuck my hot boyfriend later.

I shake my head to clear it and wait on Edward to finish threatening Mike before we end up late for class. Mike nods and I grab Edward, deciding school can wait another day, and drag him off to my car so we can go home because I need to violate him properly. His gangly body stumbles along behind me as I high tail it through the hallways, giddy in my euphoric state.

Life is good.

**A/N: Okay, here's the follow up. I know a lot of you put me on alert but I don't think I'm going to be making this into a full out story. I know there are some unresolved issues and it's not realistic for Edward to go from suicidal to perfectly happy over night, but I've got other stories to work on as well and I know most of you are waiting on Tough Love. Also, this is my first time trying to write in the present tense so bear with me. Review? **


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